Throughout my SCPC Level 2 journey over the past month, I have discovered the profound value of presence, the necessity for client autonomy, the indispensability of self-awareness, and the importance of maintaining a forward focus. These insights have shaped my approach, my relationships with my clients, and my own self-awareness.
The Power of Flow and Presence
One of the most critical insights I will take from the past month is the importance of flow and presence. So much can be missed when you are not fully present with the client. So much coaching is about presence—about fully engaging and picking up on the subtleties of what is coming up for the client. It is also about letting go of my own expectations of where a conversation may or may not be going. That is not in my hands.
One analogy shared by Ritu during one of our sessions really changed my approach to coaching. She explained how coaching is like holding sand in my hand. It requires a delicate balance. If I clasp too tightly, I lose grains through my fingers; if I keep too loosely, the sand simply falls out. This analogy has guided me in maintaining a balanced approach with clients, allowing me to stay present while holding all that I have learned and all the tools available to me in the back of my mind.
I am not constrained by the need to have a rigid structure in place when I’m in a coaching conversation; I allow the frameworks and tools to guide me without dictating what happens. When I achieve this kind of presence during sessions, my coaching conversations attain a greater depth, breakthroughs occur more organically, and the overall connection feels more authentic and helpful.
Moving Away from the Need to Fix
When I started this journey, I was deeply motivated and influenced by a need to ‘fix’ things for clients. This came from a place of empathy and good intentions, yet it really risked disempowering my clients rather than enabling them to navigate their challenges independently.
During level 2, I am learning to create a space for clients to find their own solutions, recognizing that they are the experts in their own lives. When clients expect me to give them a solution instead of proposing one, I can reframe the situation by asking, “What would you tell yourself you should do?” This question can lead the client to a moment of introspection and eventually to crafting their own solutions. Ultimately, I am not here to fix or impose but to facilitate and empower, making them feel valued and respected.
Deepening Self-Awareness
Self-awareness emerged as a key theme in my journey. I became aware of my own internal judge, who had a habit of constantly critiquing how I behaved during a session, to the point where I became too focused on the performance of coaching rather than actually being a coach. To confront this, I started journaling about my coaching sessions, noting down my thoughts and feelings. This helped me identify when my internal judge was being too harsh or when I was overly focused on performance.
Through this process, I have developed a clearer understanding of my strengths and areas for improvement. This self-exploration has helped me become a better coach and has also been a catalyst for personal growth in many different aspects of my life. Throughout this journey, I have learned that the very tools I employ in coaching—reflection, powerful questioning, and being non-judgemental —are just as valuable when applied to my internal world.
Coaching as a Forward-Moving Process
One crucial theme that emerged during the past month was the forward-moving nature of coaching. Coaching is about something other than dwelling on the past or spending extensive time dissecting problems. Instead, it is about refocusing the lens toward possibilities, opportunities, and actions. I learned that there are a lot of tools that I can use to shift the focus from the past to the future. For example, I can facilitate clients’ exploration of a future where they have overcome their current challenges. This forward-thinking approach instills a sense of hope and optimism in clients, enabling them to be unstuck, and, most importantly, serves them and not my own curiosity about their past or general pain points. This emphasis on the forward-moving nature of coaching is meant to inspire and motivate you in your own coaching journey.
Concluding Thoughts
Every step in my coaching journey has deepened my understanding of myself, increased my awareness of my biases and motivations, and evolved my approach to working with clients. Reflecting on my journey, I see a profound transformation from where I started. I have experienced immeasurable growth personally and professionally, and the lessons I have learned are invaluable. It has been a journey of continuous learning, adaptation, and reflection, one that I am certain will keep evolving with each client, each session, each skill builder, each mentoring, and each revelation. This stress on continuous learning is meant to keep you engaged and committed in your own coaching journey.
